I’m kind of down on the military right now. I feel like they’re out of shape and unprepared. I can’t speak for the rest of the world, but from my own observations, Covid has seemed to really dulled their edge here. Relaxed standards, non-uniform days, copious amounts of time off for what basically amounts to nothing (nothing is earned – it just happens whether you do a good job on anything or not) have taken the fight out of them, and many of the things that in the past have been known to form unit cohesion and discipline have been jettisoned by a new crowd of leaders who seem to think comfort is the key.
Listen, I worked an easy job for 27 years relative to combat – I spent a lot of time in full chem gear doing it, but I never had to fire a weapon under those conditions. Still, there was something to be said for coming through a couple of grueling weeks of long days, high-stress scenarios, and rigorous inspections that mattered. It seems that’s all gone now. As nice as it sounds, “inspections” that are meant to “help us help you” rather than hold someone accountable for their work breed complacency and an “it’ll get done when I get to it” attitude.
So, having said that, I’m going to actually recommend the military. The Air Force in particular. Do four years on a job in the trades – plumber, electrician, mechanic, HVAC specialist. Start work on a degree if you want with tuition assistance or other benefits. It’s basically a 4-year work-study program where they actually pay you quite well for entry-level, give you free medical care, a place to live and food to eat, plus 30 days paid vacation every year from year one. Throw in all of the double holidays (an extra day off for just about every federal holiday), and time off for “resiliency” and, well, just about any time you have to run errands. You also get to travel and learn a few non-tangible skills doing a job that really isn’t that demanding.
Four years later, you’re out with a ton of experience, a trade, and if you were ambitious enough, maybe you used your free time to get a business degree. If you didn’t, there’s always the GI bill ready to finish that off. Then you’re looking at either starting your own business or apprenticing with someone well-established by your mid-20s. Sounds like a sweet gig, and all you’ve got to hope for is that the lack of readiness and discipline in the US military doesn’t tempt nefarious global actors to do anything that’ll actually call on you to, you know, defend your country or anything.
Yeah, it’s a real crap shoot right now, but what else are you going to do? College? Where you pay them and come out with nothing but a mound of debt? I’m telling you, the military is gold.
I was out walking the dog this morning when I saw a woman struggling to get a toddler out of her car and into daycare. I don’t begrudge women in the workforce at all – I’m just not a fan of dual-income families that blow a quarter of that income having someone else watch their kids. I know people who have pulled it off somewhat well, but (and this is my personal opinion…although I think I’m actually on to something here) I can’t think of a better person to take care of children than the mother or father.
I’ve known two absolutely solid stay-at-home dads who really get the most out of life with the kids, and I’m quite jealous to tell you the truth. Children (should you choose to have them), are an absolute treasure. I can’t see just cutting them loose and dumping them on someone else for a few bucks more. Of course, I’m speaking from the other side of a good 40 years as a functioning adult. It’s just one of those things that I would consider given another chance – staying home with the kids and doing my part in forming them into the young men and women I would want them to be. Oh – and having at least three. I come from a family of six kids, and I love larger families, so I think at least three is quite reasonable.
But no offense to those dual-income families out there. It’s just that, when I weigh the costs and benefits of dual-income versus single-income families, I’m saying the single-income where one parent invests in the children just seems to be the optimal scenario. Now, it might mean holding off on the Mediterranean cruises, but it also means the joy of (in most cases) a deeply close and loving family. And, if you stick around in the military beyond the four years I’ve suggested (if that’s your route), having a family is somewhat affordable. We did it with two kids and room to spare, and my wife, who managed the home for all those years, was just as much “at work” as I was the whole time.
Lastly – if I were a stay-at-home dad, I’d home-school for sure. I don’t want to throw shade on teachers in public schools at all – for every kook you see as an example of “crazy” on right-leaning media, there are thousands of others who pour their true hearts and souls into children. It isn’t necessarily the people that are the problem (except maybe at the higher levels) – it’s the system. The public education system has taken a bent with which I can’t agree. It seems in many cases they’ve gotten away from the basics and gone all-in on usurping the parental responsibility of “forming the child” in the image they think best. It’s just that the image the government sees as best is not necessarily the one that I think fits the category.
And so, I would stay at home. I would teach my kids. And I think I’d actually love it.
Sadly, none of these will come to pass in my life (but the second, which already has). I’m just saying, these are three things that I would consider. Who knows though? Maybe I could plant the idea in someone for which it isn’t too late. That sure would be worth it…