I remember a time a while back when I was teaching a group through Paul’s letter to the Ephesian church, and we came upon Chapter 5. I knew I had to be careful because Paul has gotten a reputation among some as being a misogynist – that is, one who discriminates against and disparages women. I remember getting into a rather heated argument with someone over a passage in one of the letters to the Corinthian church that seemed to do just that. The debate on that is for another time, but it does fit in here a bit. Because if you’ve read any of my posts on studying the Word, you’ll know that I insist on context, and more specifically in cases like this, the context of the entire Bible.
But those who know something of Ephesians chapter 5 might know that there’s a section within it that contains wording that might make some bristle. In verses 22–24, it says, “22 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.” True, it’s a hard passage for some to stomach, but again we should look at the context. Those verses are followed immediately by “25 Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, 26 that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, 27 so that he might present the church to himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish. 28 In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. 29 For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as Christ does the church, 30 because we are members of his body. 31 ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ 32 This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church. 33 However, let each one of you love his wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.”
These words demand of the husband a sacrificial love and hearken to a passage that Jesus himself quotes from the Old Testament that implies that the husband is not complete without his wife. And this is true from the beginning. Man was created, and yet was incomplete. Woman was created as a complement to the man, in order to complete him. They were both created in the image of God and are clearly of equal value (this is something that is often neglected).
And then in Genesis 3, it all was turned on its head. Eve, who should have been the perfect companion to Adam, breaks from that and takes of the fruit. But it’s not just her fault. When you read the passage, you see that Adam is standing right there. He listens as the snake deceives her. She gives him the fruit, he eats of it. Not once did he exert any authority. Not once did he step in and say “no, this is not right.” And the bond with God is broken. The punishment is a separation of fellowship with our creator. And toil, pain, and deceit.
And all Paul can do in Ephesians is give us a picture of how it was meant to be, a picture of such symbiotic harmony, where each sacrificially gives of themselves for the other. “This mystery is profound, and I am saying that it refers to Christ and the church.”
But is he saying the wife takes a role less vital, as a submissive servant who keeps her mouth shut and accepts the abuse of the husband? Is he saying that women are of less value? That they don’t matter? That they can’t do anything without the blessing of a man?
Of course not.
And you know that through what is said in the rest of the Bible. You don’t even have to look that far. You see it right there in the verse immediately before the passage – verse 21: You are to live your Christian lives “submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.” He’s not just talking to the men there. Or the women. He’s talking to Christians.
But there’s more. You see throughout the New Testament references to women in important roles in the church. In Paul’s own ministry he relied on two amazing women, Phoebe and Priscilla. Dorcas (Tabitha), Eunice, and Lois stand out. Lydia was a successful businesswoman. And then of course, there are the women of Jesus’s ministry on Earth. Martha and her sister Mary. Mary Magdalene (a prostitute). A Samaritan woman at the well who was known to sleep around. Jesus did things that just weren’t done at that time. He healed a woman who was bleeding (and unclean). Most importantly, the first to encounter the risen Jesus – the first witnesses to his resurrection – were women, in a time and culture where women could not be considered credible witnesses. And yet, there they are – the first to proclaim the risen Lord. The Bible doesn’t sweep that under the rug.
But today it was the Old Testament that brought this to mind, in a famous passage that I’d read so many times before. The book of Proverbs ends with an incredible passage in chapter 31 that, for some reason, made the context so much clearer for me today:
The Woman Who Fears the Lord
10 An excellent wife who can find?
She is far more precious than jewels.
11 The heart of her husband trusts in her,
and he will have no lack of gain.
12 She does him good, and not harm,
all the days of her life.
13 She seeks wool and flax,
and works with willing hands.
14 She is like the ships of the merchant;
she brings her food from afar.
15 She rises while it is yet night
and provides food for her household
and portions for her maidens.
16 She considers a field and buys it;
with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
17 She dresses herself with strength
and makes her arms strong.
18 She perceives that her merchandise is profitable.
Her lamp does not go out at night.
19 She puts her hands to the distaff,
and her hands hold the spindle.
20 She opens her hand to the poor
and reaches out her hands to the needy.
21 She is not afraid of snow for her household,
for all her household are clothed in scarlet.
22 She makes bed coverings for herself;
her clothing is fine linen and purple.
23 Her husband is known in the gates
when he sits among the elders of the land.
24 She makes linen garments and sells them;
she delivers sashes to the merchant.
25 Strength and dignity are her clothing,
and she laughs at the time to come.
26 She opens her mouth with wisdom,
and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
27 She looks well to the ways of her household
and does not eat the bread of idleness.
28 Her children rise up and call her blessed;
her husband also, and he praises her:
29 “Many women have done excellently,
but you surpass them all.”
30 Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain,
but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
31 Give her of the fruit of her hands,
and let her works praise her in the gates.
Paul knew this passage, and it’s certainly not in the Bible just to show us how to run a business or buy land. It shows us a person of great value and it makes no excuses for it. And it’s one of the passages that gives us the context from the Bible to prove the worth and independence of women.
