Thomas was a dandy man, all dressed in finest silk. And every time you clapped your hands, he’d take a drink of milk. “Please stop!” he’d cry in agony. “I cannot take much more!” “This constant flow of milk,” he said, “Is making life a bore.” “So busy drinking greedily, I have no time for play Or reading books or eating sweets, To while away my day!” “The pleasures that I one time knew are disappearing fast. So stop your clapping right away, or I may never last!” We don’t know how this came to be, this curse upon our friend. But if we want to be of help, we’ve got to make it end. It’s hard to drink a lot of milk – it simply isn’t done. And if old Tom could have his way, he’d rather just have none. But drink he must until the curse is lifted somehow soon. And if we can’t perhaps it’s best we send him to the moon. It’s there I’m sure he’ll feel at home, as happy as you please, cuz if the stories told are true, the moon is made of cheese! And cheese is made from milk you see, of which Tom has a bunch. And if you stop your clapping, he will gladly make you lunch. Of any cheese that you might wish, and milk upon the side. But keep in mind a lot of cheese is bound to make you wide. Or make you lots of other things – some pleasant, others not. Cuz if you’ve eaten too much cheese it makes you toot a lot! So if you want to clap for Tom, best stop before you start. And give us all a break Because it’s better not to… ...go through all of that trouble anyway.
